I’ve been itching to blog about “the mold” that seemingly exists everywhere I go nowadays.. but I will refrain. at least from writing as much as I initially wanted to. What is the mold? The Christian mold. The predetermined set of rules and regulations that one must follow to be a “good Christian”, a “co-leader”, a leader.. etc.

Coming into college 3 and a half years ago, I had expectations for people. Visions for the way things were supposed to turn out. Standards for people all around me to be a certain way. People, leaders, friends, whoever they were, wherever they were. Now, 3.5 years later… I think I can safely say that my view is far from perfect, but it is certainly more clear than before. What is the mold? It doesn’t matter. There is no mold. bam… there it is…… revolutionary? No. exactly far from it… I guess that’s what I get for blogging about a conviction months later. hehe.

A couple things on my heart:
1. daily faithfulness. my semester’s theme. be renewed every single day.. refreshed to live for Jesus, for the Gospel, for the glory of God. I should never be content with being faithful one day out of 7. We need to be faithful.. every. single. day. my prayer: “may the words of my mouth be pleasing to You. every hour, every moment, I want to be a blessing.”

2. for His eyes only. yes, I am prideful in many areas of my life. aren’t we all?? my goal for this semester is that I’d be living for God’s eyes. simple as that. all for the “well done, my good and faithful servant.”

3. far/par. far/par. far/par.

Here is my little plug. It’s been basically exactly a year since I surprisingly followed through with my personal conviction to pray more for the FARPAR area here on campus. I’ve never been one to really follow through with something like this, so I guess looking back, it is crazy to see God’s faithfulness in using a scrub like me to spark something like this. Granted, it is barely anything yet, but I have faith that God is working and will continue to grow all of our hearts to love this area, love this world.

Pray for the Christians and non-Christians in the FAR/PAR area. Pray for revival. Pray that God’s will would be done here.

My vision was/is to see Christians from all different backgrounds rise up together for the kingdom. I’ve walked into so many different classrooms, down so many different hallways, past so many different faces on this campus. It is overwhelming to think about how many lost souls we are all surrounded with in this small little city of champaign-urbana. So what do we do? Pray for the place we are called to. There is a battle going on in FAR/PAR whether we see it or not, whether I see it or not.

As a Christian, shouldn’t my heart break for the broken and lost? Shouldn’t my heart desperately want to join together with fellow brothers and sisters who are fighting the same fight? I have salvation in my heart, but what about the stranger sitting next to me in the lounge? in the computer lab? in my classroom? at the table to my left in the dining hall? Where is the anguish in my heart for their salvation?

Mm.. I am a failure so obviously my heart does not break for the broken and lost 24/7. I am sinful and my heart wanders and longs for things of this world. But there is most certainly plenty times where my heart does break. Those are the times I am reminded of what I need to do. Pray pray pray. Because it is not by my strength, but by the grace of God that revival will come and sweep through this place.

too many thoughts…. hehe.

here’s an amazing song to cap this off. such simple lyrics and yet they are freaking powerful beyond belief.

“set a fire down in my soul that i can’t contain, that i can’t control. i want more of You, God.”

I want to live with the JOY of salvation.

- jahn

—–

The room was a dark steel color. Maybe about fifty feet high. There had to be around eighty people scattered all around the huge room. Half of them were in panic, half of them not so much. I was screaming at a bunch of people to quiet down and turn off the lights because no one really cared to listen. The zombies love light… and noise… and eating people..

There’s two entrances to this huge fieldhouse. One on the west side and one on the east. Both had three sets of doors, two sliding ones that meet together with a sliding lock and one normal double door that just closes shut. Clearly people didn’t really take much of the situation because before we knew it, the zombies were rushing in the west door.

No, it wasn’t zombies just yet. a bunch of people with completely stoic faces carrying trays of food above their shoulders for us to eat. They looked like a bunch of waiters that were hired to just drop off some food and leave. People ate it up. continueeee

zombies started coming in through the west door now. people died… probably. I made it into the random little room on the north side of the fieldhouse. There was a small little door with a couple steps going up to it, and then there was a decently sized glass window that overlooked the whole room from afar. This door locks. Life goes quiet for about 10 minutes. There are two black girls in this random little room doing some dishes and chilling as if life is grand and we are not all being attacked by zombies that want to eat us alive. We make casual conversation and when it’s just getting good, I looked out the window after hearing a noise and see forty or fifty people come racing back into the room. I run out and shut the doors behind them. They are panicked… but they don’t really stay panicked for too long. I guess this room is safe. I explain to them that I went through all this before so they start to listen to me. We shut off the lights but for some reason, everyone still refuses to shut up. ….. so naturally the zombies come back.

I run to the east side door to close it and I see the youth coming towards the room. The minimum age in the room at that point had to be at least 20 and here was a huge crowd of kids, all under 18. I looked at them right in the eyes as they approached me. I was sure they weren’t infected so I let fifteen of them into the door. I shut it quickly because I was not about to let one scrub come in and kill all of us.

One of my YG kids came straight up to the door and slammed it once with the palm of his hand. **** just got real man… (lol). I could tell he was looking straight at me but I slowly looked down and walked away from the door. The zombies were too close. How could I let a small group of people into the room and risk the safety of everyone else in here? I couldn’t… I had to let them run out there.

Somehow a bunch of us ended up in the kitchen area through the door from the fieldhouse. Maybe 15 or 20. Only a couple of us had guns. Pistols. I unzipped my pistol bag… to reveal another bag. I unzipped that one and took out my gun, three bullet looking things, and a tiny grenade. Tiny… it was literally like the size of my finger. I gave a little speech while half of them weren’t really paying attention. I didn’t really care… if they wanted to die then they could just die. LOL!

We marched out into the house. House? Yeah, all of a sudden we were in some huge house. We had to pass by a bedroom on our way to the front door. Some guy and girl were laying under the covers saying that they wanted to stay and be completely silent instead of going to war. What was I supposed to say? I said okay and we were on our way.

We made it down to the first floor and everything seemed normal. There was about 30 of us now. I looked out the big glass window and saw security roaming around the doors. I guess we were safe? No.. the radio said the security guards were all being murdered. I looked out again and saw the 8 security guards getting freaking owned by a bunch of orange zombies. Awesome. They fought well for all of about 5 seconds and then they all died. Next? Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of zombies rushing to our house. They made it to our front door.

Some girl was downstairs next to the intercom. It buzzed, “Hi, could you let us in?” I told her it was the zombie…. and not respond. Obviously, she’s dumb because she responded and they had a little conversation. But she didn’t let them in. The zombies realized that we were sitting in a house and they were outside… so they spread out and surrounded the entire house and then broke in. I looked up to the second floor up the stairs and saw a couple coming in through the window. Pistol in hand….. I woke up.

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??? LOL!!! I seriously wanted to blow some zombie heads off……… and my alarm woke me up after the most epic dream I’ve had in months….. I seriously can’t even describe the amount of detail this dream had and I think I saw at least like 20 different people I knew….. and I didn’t get to kill a single zombie………. seriously a travesty. anyway…. woo!

- jahn

That’s what I probably would’ve started out with if I blogged on the first like I had planned… but alas, here I am two days late… but who cares.

There are probably… tens and tens of things that I really want to blog about but I’ll keep it short because things are CHANGING. life is CHANGING. and I guess for the first time in a while, it is exciting!

I’ll start with my emo-ness and get to the good stuff soon enough. Home is hard. I’ve been constantly reminded how much I suck here and how much my life has changed since I was in high school and just how circumstances can really make you think the worst of what you have. My house is a mess and kinda reflects the state of my life… because I am kind of a mess. I gained at least 5 pounds since I’ve been home and it is greatly attributed to late night meals and the fact that my dad literally could feed an entire small group with every home-cooked meal he makes with his gigantic portions. I finally understand why I wasn’t skinny growing up. okay. it is soon enough. good stuff.

What’s on my mind as of late? It’s been about 4 days since I got back from Lake Geneva, WI. Four days and three nights in a place I haven’t been to since a long, long, long time ago for an AFC retreat. Why was I back? Another AFC retreat. I remember walking the paths going from place to place for different scheduled meetings when I was in junior high and high school at the retreat center. Everything seemed super far and uncomfortable. It took forever to walk from the cabin, to the dining room, to the gym to play basketball. Back at the age of 21, the place is actually pretty small. The gym from the dining hall was definitely the longest walk I remember… but it took like two minutes. lol.

Anyway. Lake Geneva, if I do say so myself, was extremely blessed at the end of 2011. “Camaraderie” to say the least of four different retreats separately working together for the sake of the Gospel to be spread. A youth group unknowingly desperate for a Savior. A worship team ill-prepared for sets, yet driven by the grace of God to bless a crowd of anxious students. A room filled with, at the VERY least, one hard heart. Pride aplenty. Stubbornness aplenty. And yet, through it all, God aplenty. Looking back and reflecting after four days of scenery change, I’m seriously so blessed to have been a part of what could eventually turn out to be the turning point in one student’s life. We definitely could have prepared more, prayed more, ran more Gospel-driven events, done more and more and more… but in the end, it wasn’t up to us. God will do what He wants to do, when He wants to do it. that’s the truth.

I was pretty failure throughout the retreat.. mainly because it was my first time playing in a full band in sooo long and it was impossible to keep a tempo. (man that even makes me feel salty in text) butttt SERIOUSLY my one hope and desire is that I was everything but stumbling for the kids there. Even though we may have played some songs ridiculously fast, I can safely say that I prayed hard that I would still be a blessing. that I would still be blessed to be a blessing, and that the room would be filled not with eyes and ears wanting to see a band, but eyes, ears, and hearts, open to worship God together. ahhhhHHHHH

It’s crazy to think that the youth group retreats all of us college students are going to right now are filled with the future generation of Christian leaders. Some of them probably aren’t even Christian yet. Some aren’t serious about Christianity. Some could care less about anybody else in their life except themselves. And yet… God is going to do some crazy things through them. At the retreat, we did something on the final night with all the small groups (i will not divulge because it doesn’t really matter what it was). It was just something humbling past the paper. It basically required each small group leader to be on their knees for the sake of completion and seriously what an experience it was. In my head, the whole thing was a bust… but somehow, I felt like it really worked. I prayed for each of my members with pretty much the same prayer. To see God’s love for them in every circumstance and really live as shining lights for Christ in this broken, messed up world. What greater hope is there for them? It’s the same prayer request I have for my daily life. Why? Because we are all the same. A bunch of sinners deserving of only Hell, and yet GRACED to live on this earth, not of it but in it, to glorify God through everything we do. Mmm… what a retreat this was. hope there are many more like it.

Speaking of… oil… my first OIL!!! am i excited??????!???!! not really… but yes. I don’t want to get my hopes up even though I know it’ll be sick.

so what do we have?
next stop: OIL
stop after that: home for the remainder of break
stop 3: back to Champaign with a renewed heart for the Lord

2012? Feels the same as 2011. Just gotta remember to write -12 at the end of my schoolwork now.
AFC’s new years service: “Did you keep your new years resolutions from 2011?? No. I don’t need to ask you to know the answer. But make resolutions 2012.” Why? We’re obviously going to fail so what’s the point? As Alfred once said… Why do we fall? So we might learn how to pick ourselves up. Gotta keep running this race bros.

Alrighty. there may be too much mashing into one here. outtie. my dream coming up after the short break…

- jahn

Where do I even begin??
Let’s just make it a quickie about tonight so I can get off to sleep and hope that a little bit more rest will heal my stupid eye.

……… hm.
I think I can safely say that after a really freaking long night proving to me that I am in fact getting older, an oddly refreshing long day, a short night that wasn’t really all that short, setup and setdown with brothers… I am thankful tonight, right now. For so many things, many people, many circumstances, but mainly Jesus. A savior who loves me through everything, even when I am in my darkest hour. Ah… Jesus. hehe…

Special praise at FARPAR Thanksgiving tonight. Pretty late notice.. didn’t really do all that much logistically.. but that is besides the point. A song of praise to the Lord.

I will seek You with my whole heart
In the center of the storm
And remember
The promise of Your love

Where can I go from Your spirit, from Your presence?
Come and take me home to Your spirit, to Your presence
Never let me go

The most real part of this song… “I have stumbled, I’m always falling and I’m humbled by my sin.” … oh it’s so sad. but then.. “the moment I confess them, You forgive, You forgive.” deep.

If there is one thing I can say without a doubt about myself from this past month, it is that I’ve been so stumbled, fell hard, and have definitely been humbled in so many different ways by my sin. But most importantly, more important than anything else in my entire life right now, in this moment, Jesus loves me despite my failures.

so now what. will I go on and fail some more? Yes, yes I will. but my hope for myself is that I will adore the Lord.
into hillsongs we went…

Let us adore him
Let us adore him
Jesus Christ is the Lord

so simple. and yet there is nothing truer.

I’m coming back to seek redemption.
I have such a long way to go… but I want to stay true to my commitments from here on out.

things on my mind…
1. praying for FARPAR… I just want to be faithful for the sake of the kingdom.
2. when Satan throws a rock at you, it makes absolutely no sense to be angry at the rock.
3. three points are not nearly enough to capture everything here…!!!!
… (edit) 4. Jesus is working in FARPAR.

Lord, change my heart. Lord, help me to have joy in my heart. Lord, I want to be thankful always and forever.

- jahn

Here we have arrived at the middle of the term. I’d say this is as good of a time as ever to refocus and see where things are headed.

I take notes of my phone with my handy little Android app “ColorNote”. Why? No, not because I think the things that I think of are somehow miraculously intelligent or blog-worthy. It’s more like me just wanting to remember the things that stuck out to me so I could look back and see what I was thinking a few months, weeks, or days ago and see if I’ve changed or learned anything in the process. That being said, I’m reminded of some retreat, sometime, with some guy that said something about journaling/diarying your blessings so that you would always be able to remember how God has blessed you. Not that that has anything to do with what I’m talking about (I guess it kind of does) but that is what’s on my mind. Here’s a little look at a few things I’ve noted over the past few months that I’m most likely never going to blog about because I don’t remember exactly what I was thinking when I noted them.

1. A couple quotes from pastor min: “promises are no substitute for preparation”. Clearly some awesome advice if you just look at how true and learnable those words are. I know it meant more to me when I wrote it down so I decided I’m not going to try and pull some bs out of thin air .
1b. “anything is paper by the grace of God” – Another winner here. I wish I knew what sermon this was from or what he was talking about when he said it because if I took the time to take out my phone and jot it down, it must’ve hit home for me.

2. “nickle&dimes. tweeners.” I just realized looking at my note that I’m dumb enough to misspell nickel. lol so dumb.

I’ll leave out a couple because I will blog about them later. Let’s say the next couple are 5 and 6.

5. “putting a header on every page or putting multiple spaces between paragraphs or making one sentence paragraphs.”
Ah, school. So I pulled an all-nighter a few weeks ago writing a 10-15 page paper for one of my creative writing classes. This is important because the prompt clearly says that the paper needed to be 10 to 15 pages. We read and critique all of our classmates stories and this is probably my favorite class so far. (it might have something to do with the fact that I don’t have exams in this class but that’s okay hehe) Anyway… I love reading my classmates’ stories because it makes me feel good about my writing skills. Is that mean? Yes, yes it is. Is it warranted? I believe so. Umm.. 10 to 15 pages? Not too bad if the prompt is “write about whatever you want”. The audacity of some of these people. I read this girl’s paper last week. It was 10 pages on the dot which is fine by me, but she had the nerve to put a header on every single page. “Jane Doe” = one line. “CW 104″ = one line. “today’s date” = one line. Three free lines on every page to count towards her total of the minimum 10 pages. I honestly wonder what goes through peoples’ heads when they do things like that for schoolwork. Not only that, page #3 poses a spacial dilemma. This girl randomly puts a three star separator in the middle of the page and then has the nerve to put multiple blank lines before and after her dumb little addition. LOL! forreeeeeeeallllll whaaaat…

6. “why do I sweat when I play guitar?? why do I sweat when I’m nervous??” Here’s a biggie. This one came after bible study a couple days ago. WHYYYYYYYYYYY??????????!!!!!! It’s not that I’m scared… and I don’t think it’s because I’m self-conscious about my voice or my guitar skills anymore. So what is it? I legitimately pray to God sometimes before I play (among other prayers that I constantly lift up while playing…………. heh..he.hehe.. i do.) and ask him to help me not to sweat this time. Is that sad? Obviously it’s sad but I do wish God would answer that prayer more often. …….. Why do I sweat when I’m nervous? I honestly don’t know but this is probably my least favorite quality about myself. Hands down… it probably is. The most awkward situations come out of sweat-filled moments. sad life.

Fact #2 about myself. I say 2 because I feel like I blogged about fact #1 sometime before. I think I’m gifted with the ability of sensing temperature and the curse of irregularly high body temperature. Once I got a smart-enough phone, I used to test myself and guess the temperature when I was outside and see if I was right by looking at the weather on my phone. I was right more often than not. <- was that sentence necessary? or does it make me sound cocky? who knows… but it is the truth. My body overreacts to heat all the time. I prefer cold to hot 100% of the time.

Hm. I need a day off from the world to decompress myself.

All Campus Worship also still on my mind. Tuesday will be a big day. Come to the second semester of our FARPAR Prayer Meeting 11:15PM somewhere in the FAR basement if you want to pray for the people of FARPAR. after all… how could you not? right? no? more on that later.

first Corinthians seven seventeen. As I'm reading it back to myself… "Each of you should continue to live in whatever situation the Lord has placed you, and remain as you were when God first called you." Huh? okay, verse twenty. "Yes, each of you should remain as you were when God called you". Okay. I'd say two times within 4 verses is a good enough hint. This is where God has placed me, called me, sent me. No time for better or worse. I'm exactly where God wants me right now. I just gotta believe that and push through.

"the time is NOW!" words of wisdom from a spontaneous lunch. and that is exactly right! the time is now for so many things. ah!!!!!!!!!

edit: i totally forgot to mention… maybe bc i secretly didn’t want to blog about it but i just chose to… i went to ride my bike today bc i was really bored and didn’t want to do some work. i almost fell 2 times. and then i did fall in downtown urbana in front of 3 complete strangers. . . . ………. seriously????? LOL! i guess it’s funny now but it was BEYOND embarrassing. but they thought it was their fault and were apologizing to me as i said “it’s okay” and quickly tried to ride away into the wind as fast as possible. my life is a joke

- jahn

IT’S THE NBAAAAAAAA………. .

43 preseason games were cancelled today because there is still no collective bargaining agreement which means.. there is no NBA season this year, so far. Honestly, I get so frustrated reading about their agreements because they’re arguing about a 2.7% change in player’s salaries. Sure, it’s millions, maybe billions of dollars over the next 15 years, but really. I still can’t really understand how people who play a game for a living can make over 200 times more per year than someone who pours sweat and blood trying to provide for their family. And even worse, they complain about not making enough money. There is something very wrong with the people in this world.

Death? It’s a funny thing. No, it’s not really funny at all. The truth of it all is that death is inevitable. In a Christian view, what’s the big deal? This world is not our home so isn’t death supposed to be a joyous occasion? We get to return to our heavenly home, free of sin and free of the wretched people in this world. But let’s say someone tells you that one of their loved ones is about to die? Do you spit out spiritual cliches and hope for the best? 

Sorry, no answer here today. 

Here’s to Romans 8.
 ”You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life because of righteousness. And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of his Spirit who lives in you.”

So what do we do? We make sure all of our loved ones know Christ because that is the greatest gift of all. No fear in death, no guilt in life, that is the power of Christ. If we really loved someone, why would we want anything less than an eternal life in heaven? 

Oh life… there is so much more to Romans 8 than I gave it credit for… and that’s only one chapter in the Bible. so much to learn. 

 ”In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.” – Romans 8:26. 

class over. time to go!

- jahn

1. The Cowboys/Jets game was pretty exciting. Do I watch football? No. but with no NBA……… what is there to do.
2. I miss the NBA. I lifted up a quick prayer for today’s meeting in New York. I’m actually pretty hopeful today and I feel like the NBA is going to make a comeback today!!!!
3. I’m going to Winter OIL 2012. After some bogusness last year… I’m just going to go this winter. I’m probably not going to have enough money… but I’m just gonna go. After sporting two OIL shirts from previous years, I think the move to the Chicagoland area is a good sign for me to break through my hesitation and just see what OIL’s got in store for me. forsure.
4. Randomly (maybe not so randomly) got myself excited for BIFF Fall 2011. hehe. . . . ………. -_-.
5. I think I got worse at explaining myself in 1-on-1 conversations. Conclusion? Either I really did get worse or my brain is just subconsciously trying to hide the fact that I’m slowly becoming a person that I never want to be. Probably the first one… but who knows. Who knows? I know. LOL! oh man.

0. “it is a privilege to serve”. “God is going to do crazy things this year.. with or without you”. on my mind.

okay real talk. real quick.

I’m going to claim this publicly.. on my blog.. because I am THAT confident. Am I crazy? No, I am not. What am I talking about? I believe it was the summer of 2009… it was a gchat conversation with a fellow Ahn. We were discussing random useless things as usual, having our awesome bouts of laughter when… it hit me. The simple “LOL” wasn’t enough. Not even the classic “LOLOL” could really encompass how much I was laughing at that moment. But how could I really express the true value behind my laughing out loud??? Oh yes. IT WAS THE “LOL!”

Seriously. I’m not saying I invented the exclamation point. No, that would be straight up crazy talk. I simply want to say that I started the revolution that we now know and see everywhere. The classic… the amazing… “LOL!” <- LOL!!!!
Do you remember anyone using it in such mass quantities? Do you believe me? Probably not. BUT DO.

I also started the "^ LOL!"… but I think that one's obvious.

thanks for listening. :p

- jahn

edit: p.s. i’m calling it right now. relationships are gonna pop up EVERYWHERE this year. yeah, that’s right… i see you. LOL!! get ‘emmmmmmmmmmmmm

Let us begin.

Rule #1 in guarding your heart.
Know this: there is no sufficient substitution for God’s love. People often look for a relationship in hopes of fulfilling some sort of void in their heart, but worldly relationships only provide temporary emotional stability followed by eventual heartache. Sure there are those rare cases where couples make it through years of hardships and difficulty without a godly foundation, but those are exactly that… rare. I don’t know about you but I’d rather not risk the longevity of my relationship on a rarity. Bottom line? Stop chasing after love from someone that has the ability to break your heart. People are always going to fail you in one way or another. We’re all conditional and selfish when the going gets tough. On the bright right side, God offers unconditional love for the cost of nothing and asks for nothing in return. Where can you find a better relationship than that? God is the best guy for you.

Rule #2. Your hormones are a devilish tool. You know that feeling you get when you’re chatting it up with someone from the opposite gender and your heart starts to flutter a little? Yeah… that’s probably the devil doing work man. LOL! okay no. not really. It might really just be God working at your future relationship… who knows. Rule #2 is really just all about knowing when to stop yourself from daydreaming about that really pretty girl and imagining that white-picket fence of a life with your three kids. (and i guess it applies to that beast of a man who provides the world for you).

Rule #3. Smileys are dangerous.

Andddd there’s the bell.

Here we are. Four weeks into the semester and I still don’t really feel like I’ve settled into this new year yet.
I’m… done for now. Things are about to get crazy……… I like FP13.

ooooooooohboooooooyyyyyyyyy much to do. much to prepare for.

“Promises are no substitute for preparation”… I need to prepare!!! ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!
alright. lezgo.

- jahn

I have just about three months of notes on my phone. Noted, backed up, but not so ready to go. There’s something about writing in the moment that really lets you capture all your emotions perfectly. This phenomenon really just isn’t the same two months later. I guess it really is all the same though. My purpose for writing is 99.. 95.. 90.. percent for myself. I mean forreal if I know people are going to read and I see my ticker go up when I post, it’s hard not to get a little biased here and there, right? I do my best to write for the sake of writing and not to please.. whoever you are. Obviously, sometimes it just doesn’t work that way.

Starting from the beginning, let us backtrack and pretend like its June of 2011. I just put down one line to remind myself how I was feeling and two months later, it’s more funny than aggravating. Someone once gave me a Jesus fish as a present to put on my car. At first, I thought to myself AWESOME. I get to put something on my car and make it look cool or different. Well, that was probably 5 years ago and.. it’s still just sitting inside my car. Why? I remember hearing a sermon from a pastor a few years back talking about exactly that. This guy proudly put his sign of a Christian life on the back of his car and drove his heart out. One day, after driving like a maniac, he said he felt really guilty for not driving in a loving, Christian manner and asked the pastor what he should do. The pastor wisely advised him that he should probably start driving in a more calm and not-so-aggressive way if he was going to keep the fish on his car. He was right! What did the guy do? He changed his… no. he just took the fish off his car.

back to me. I remember that story every time I look at that Jesus fish and think to myself… does my driving really show the love of Christ to strangers on the road? Granted, I am so much less of a typical 16-year-old ricer Asian boy driver than I used to be in high school, but there are still times when I love to punch it to get some heartbeats bumping closer together. I keep that fish off mainly because I hate my car so much that I don’t think it deserves any special treatment… but also because the show of my driving still needs some work. I’m getting there.

to the point…… I can’t say the same for the guy driving an ugly mini-van who cut me off while proudly displaying his 94.3 K-LOVE sticker on his rear bumper. lol forreal. laughable!!!

One week of the first semester of my… senior… second to last year in undergrad.. is over. I still remember my freshman year in Champaign….. !!! We’re all getting old.

I learned how to ride a bike when I was in 6th? 7th grade? Yes, for the first time. I think I’m going to bring a mountain bike to campus after labor day weekend. “It’s like riding a bike!” I am 0% confident in my ability of riding a bike after only having a couple weeks of my childhood that I could consider “experience”. Don’t laugh at me if I fall

I think I got worse at bowling. I’m excited for tonight. I really love how the bus from campus back to my apartment drops me off right in front of my apartment. a shorter walk from last year to my room in the carrner of the depths of PAR.

appetizer. MORE to COME! it’s gonna be a crazy year.

- jahn